Would you step onto a free houseboat... if it reeked of mildew, blood, and old family curses?

Frank Peniston just inherited Uncle Perceval's floating disaster - a rotting vessel moored at Welvin Harbor. But when Frank and Ronald crack open a trunk of occult journals, strange sketches, and warnings scrawled in blood, they realize Perceval left behind more than just property.

Because the boat doesn't want to be flipped. It wants to be fed.

Soon, Frank and Ronald are adrift on open water with no shoreline in sight. Knocks echo from below the hull. Whispering voices seep through the portholes. Chains drag across the deck, pulled by something alive beneath. When night falls, the ocean turns to black glass - and from its depths rises a presence Frank has fought before, a cosmic entity that chews through bloodlines and waits for Peniston flesh.

To survive, Frank will need every duct-taped gadget, every ounce of vigilante grit, and the kind of over-the-top courage only found in satirical mystery thrillers. Because this time the stakes aren't lawns or parking lots. This time, it's Welvin's soul... and Frank's last foot.

Fans of bizarro detective fiction, absurd action comedy, and supernatural noir parody will be hooked. Step aboard if you dare - but remember: the ocean doesn't forgive. It only waits.