Hi, hello, hey. My name is Dan Adams, and thank you very much for picking up my book. What follows for the next one hundred thousand words or so is the story of the first time I fell in love. 'One hundred thousand words?!' you say? Well, yes. Then add about thirty thousand more. 'What kind of teenage crush requires a novel with that many words?' MY ONE! OKAY?! Damn. Let me have my moment! Anyway. Set out in these pages is the tale of my first love affair. Here I lay it all out for the world to read, laugh and judge, so I can finally be free from the fuckery of it all. (Can I swear on a blurb?) I hope you enjoy reading about my journey as a small, gay seventeen-year-old and one particular infamous boy with ocean blue eyes.